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Faina Bona lights up the National Library with a more-than-competent photographer in Latvia. Every week, I get contacted by someone somewhere asking if they can be paid to do my job. The answer is always yes--as long as they can find women like Faina to shoot. Contributors must also agree that to be called a pervert is hardly an insult.

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Even though science, my wife's advice, and personal experience has taught me to avoid refined sugar and food coloring, I doubt that I have consumed my last Eegee's frozen fruit drink. They are a source of nostalgia. When I moved to Tucson for college, it was the first thing that alleviated me from the desert heat. The U of A handed out large complimentary samples at their new student orientation and I immediately became a fan. Same thing for Brandy Gila, her chill vibes are addictive.

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Shelley Fox is as game as it gets when it comes to teasing with her intense curves. She is from Hungary and her body is completely unaltered. Doctors only wish they had this kind of talent. Shelley comes off as shy at first, but after spending time with her, I realize she is mostly very contemplative. A sultry energy like hers is usually accompanied with some mystery. Don't ask too many questions.

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Here is the second part of my idyllic morning with Jezebel. There will be a part three that continues in her bedroom, but that will drop much later. Don't worry. It will be worth the wait. And remember, I am always available to photograph your beautiful wild friendloversistercousinmother whenever she is ready to be admired by thousands. Have a great weekend.

When the front desk supervisor tappedhim on the shoulder to discuss a guest's complaint about lewd photography taking place in the parking lot, Mr. Venice was quick to apologize. I feel great remorse for many things. I'm sorry for my nonchalance over peanut allergies. I'm sorry for my disgust over plot holes in this season's Game of Thrones. I'm sorry for my mistrust of the liberal media and for my skepticism with the idea that equity is crucial for our society's future. And I am deeply, deeply sorry for my inability to cope with the imminent demise of... Thank you, sir. Enjoy your stay at Homewood Suites by Hilton. Ursula Hall is fun.

"Here's a little potpourri of skin and beauty from our contributor in Moscow. These photos of Ira Sedina were captured in a stealthy way with a smaller 'snapshot-style' camera for good reason. I was told, but can not remember the exact story which came with this content. Something about an angry employee at the aquarium, inappropriate attire, blah blah blah. All I know is that Ira is always a friend to the camera. At the end of the gallery, she sent me a few photos from her phone while she recovered from an 'accident'. I think she just got a nose job, but whatever. I am happy to see Ira back. Sol meme degens check out $VHS (CA: 5e41GfrQwTP74LgGt6WP9kw6xa1jQhAERCjnFKf74y52)"

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"Fall weather comes around like a neighbor who knows your name but doesn't ask too many questions. Chills begin making you appreciate the warm spots at the metro station. The wind’s got that little bite, not cold enough to hurt but enough to remind you that you’re still alive, still part of the world that insists on spinning even when you’d rather it didn’t. You throw on that old jacket, the one that’s seen too many BBQ bacon cheeseburgers and too few laundromats, and suddenly, you’re a poet with pockets. Part two of Agos tomorrow. Glad she keeps coming around."

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I photographed Marie Boitte on a windy day in San Francisco. She is a transplant from France. Supposedly Mark Twain wrote this about the city, The coldest winter I ever saw was the summer I spent in San Francisco. I mostly associate the Bay Area with non-existent parking spaces and the faint stench of human fecal matter wafting through the air. Bon appetit.

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Happy Easter. Here is part dos of the lovely Gabbie Carter and our time at the Santa Monica Pier. We did not really go. This all photoshopped. I actually shot the entire gallery at a professional studio with three assistants on-hand. I love to slackline, which is what Gabbie is doing towards the end of the gallery. It takes time to learn and you must fail countless times before any significant success.

Here are two fabulous women that I went above and beyond to bring to Zishy. Shyla Volbeck, the brunette, is very kind and approachable despite her intimidating beauty. Moon Torrance is ultra-confident in herself and outspoken with her views. Both could work in the seedy underworld of the fashion industry if they were so inclined. Luckily, we can see them be more than mannequins pushing absurdly priced products here at Zishy.

If you want to witness the decline of the American Empire first-hand, go visit a shopping mall or a retail box store today. These places are not long for this world. The veneer of consumerist bliss is now showing major cracks. As a celebrationcommemoration, Lila Love tried baring her crack for us at a local Target. This girl is adorable and her fake name suits her perfectly. She constantly looks like she's falling in love.

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WARNING! The man in the header photo of this update is a bonafide killer, as in buzz-killer. I assume he is the manager of this particular Publix supermarket, although we were not shown any official credentials. Guy walked right up to us and rudely asked us to leave the store. This injustice must not go unheard. Sasha was merely exercising her rights to free speech and sexual empowerment. Men like him want to silence the women's movement. Maybe he would like to see Sasha in a burka? Disgusting. Sponsored by Sprouts.

Gaby Mueller has crazy acrobatic skills. She busted out these moves without much of a warm-up and being long out of practice. I never thought I would also be in the superhero game, but here I am. BTW, I just tested positive for being teased out of my mind by Gaby.

Our finale with Sasha Apex has arrived. Since I photographed her, she got implants. Ladies, I'm sorry but I just can not stand bolt-on's. Give me low-hanging flapjacks or a perfectly flat chest over some artificial substance surgically inserted under a woman's skin. And in what fantasy world are Sasha's natural breasts even close to unappealing? She also hated reading some of your guys' comments on her tattoos. Anyways, I wish her the best and I remain grateful for the shoots. Bonus video to come.

Florida Mishlove works hard for you bastards. You better be a subscriber. I don't know how many people write me asking about what gear I use, where I find my models, if they can use my photos for this and that. I always first ask the same question, are you a subscriber? I'd say, nine times out of ten, they ain't. C'mon, guys. The cost of admission is practically nothing now with inflation and Zishy has been the same price since 2013.

"Introducing Jacie Verbena. I like her. She seems like she has a good time being photographed. Kudos to our contributor in Ukraine. Does your government ask your permission before sending its citizens to kill or die? Doubt it. War is dumb. Part 2 tomorrow."

When I shoot, I am mostly trying to create both pretty and interesting pictures. I am trying to highlight what I find appealing about my subject, but I'm also trying to build a relatable fantasy for my audience. I want to bring them into worlds that are not easily accessible. I want to showcase wild personalities and special moments in time. I want to inspire, entertain, and give people, mostly men, a feeling of acceptance for their instinctual nature. I want to share my humor at these absurd biological conditions we live in. But most importantly, I want to make a dollar, because my wife's tastes get more goddamn expensive every single year. So subscribe and enjoy!

Hey, guys! Today I want to announce my re-retirement from photography. I just discovered the effectiveness of AI for creating art, so I will be relying on that moving forward. You might think I actually traveled to and photographed the beautiful Zoey Luna, but no, you would be dead wrong. I simply asked HAL 9000 to generate 68 teasy photos of a sexual Australian woman with red hair, petite breasts and a perfectly round rump. This set of images is what he spat out. Well, I am impressed. Sadly, AI is very costly, so I still need you to fork over subscription fees. I truly appreciate the support. Now open the doors, HAL.

I meet so many incredible women when I travel and yet Nika Nikitina still stands out. She is like lighting in a bottle. And just like lighting, she is not easy to photograph. She puts on a blistering pace from the get-go. If you don't know how to operate your camera instinctually, you will be screwed. Lucky for me, I have put in the hours and know little else besides this chase. Chasing beauty--I have surrendered myself to this calling. Will probably be at it until the end, boys. Stay along for the ride.

Aria Sky wolfed down the cupcake faster than I had planned. I wanted to get a few more messy shots, maybe a video, but that chocolate goodness was screaming her name. And anyways, this leaves more sploshing ground for Zishy to cover. Since these were taken, Aria has been on hiatus from modeling. I'm not sure where she is or how she is doing, but my invitation for her to return remains open. Drown out the hate, Aria. The world will catch up.

"The Call Her Daddy host asked what she considered a profound question. Can you think of a law that gives the government the power to make a decision about a man's body? The absent-minded presidential candidate, chuckled and said she couldn't think of any. Some critics might present obvious arguments like an involuntary military draft or perhaps even imprisonment, but what about something as simple as narcotics use? I am pretty sure the government tells us all that if we ingest certain chemicals, we become criminals. Hell, Tommy Chong got 9 months for selling bongs! And what about it being unlawful to drop a deuce on your own front yard? Too many damn rules. So ladies, don't worry. You're not being singled out here."

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Ivah Anseline is very fit. She probably does not drink Coke products, eat a lot of potato chips, nor spend hours each day on her couch. Most human dilemmas have simple answers, just not easy ones. Ivah does not have a can-do attitude, it is more of a will-do attitude.

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"I didn't get the follower count that I wanted, but it is okay. Life has been kind to me. So here is the rest of what I have of Miki. Use it as inspiration. And yes, as a subscriber, you see her move that arm."

The story with Chase Jenaro is that she wanted to make some extra money exploring her kinky side before she left for boot camp. Chase had enlisted in the military a few months prior and had worked hard to get her body into shape. She felt a renewed confidence and wanted to showcase her results. I eagerly accepted the opportunity. There will be more to come of this brave beauty. Go easy on the holiday cookies!

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Guys, I feel that I have misled you in some way and I am tired of carrying around all this guilt. I must make a shocking confession. I am trans. I was born a female. I wore dresses, played with dolls, tortured kittens, you know, everything that little girls normally do. But something never felt right. I began getting interested in trucks and math and even started fantasizing about my teenage babysitter, Jessica. I wanted to do everything that boys did, I wanted to eventually pleasure women in the ways only men could--the dick, the balls, the large bank account. I needed it all. So after third grade, I made the leap. I started taking hormone blockers and surgically transitioned to becoming a man. I have to say, it was the best decision that I ever made as a child. God bless Portland and Patsy Ford.

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"There's a lot to like about Ellie Nova. She has had a wild ride this year dipping her toes into the adult industry. I took her to Chuy's for steak fajitas and she told me her story. More to come. Bonus video tomorrow."

Rose Fessenden is a sight to behold. I hope she loves these photos of her as much as I do. Enjoy the weekend and say hello to your mother for me.

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Howdy! Here's a 10 minute long video digest featuring footage from the last three photo updates. I might make a habit of doing videos this way. Let me know what you think. Have a great weekend and don't go rubbing your crotch on a cheese grater. That would hurt. xoxo

Alevtina Batman is one of the women that I show to potential models before a shoot. Her willingness to interact with the camera is exemplary and instinctual. She brought me to her local health food store for a quick bite. Then, Alevtina showed me around her neighborhood in Moscow. Generally, when I visit this part of the world, I am enjoying the tranquility of a small town setting. But after a while, I start to crave the anonymity and give-zero-fux mentality of a crowded city. Alevtina concurs. A natural performer like her deserves a large audience.

It is remarkable that Austin is the home of two of the wildest, blonde, busty adult starlets from recent memory. Though when it comes to uninhibited energy, Angel Youngs takes the blue ribbon. We went shopping. then took some pics in the parking lot. My mind was filled with thoughts like--Is this really happening? Life rips! She is the real deal. Happy Birthday, Angel.
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