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Kurt Cobain was a pussy. He let us nineties-kids down. The new generation, like the one Vonnie Bean is part of, has a laundry list of profound issues to resolve and with the guidance of mostly talentless heroes. The apocalypse is right around the corner and the kids are still smiling, dancing, and making TikTok videos. They might be idiots, but I still enjoy them more than the idiots my age. The ones whose lives are dictated by mortgages, political affiliations, and favorite sports teams. Today's adults don't want the kids using drugs, making porn, or hurting anyone's feelings. Instead they offer what? Participation Trophies? An endless psychotic nightmare permeated by government surveillance and personalized advertising? Maybe Kurt was onto something. But he still is a pussy. Vonnie took an outdoor leak for the first time in the bonus video.
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Hey, guys. Back on this beautiful Friday with a follow-up to Venus' most recent update. This woman is magnificent. She might have a few extra pounds, but this is Texas and we don't worry ourselves about a few extra pounds. Are you happy, pleasant to be around, and can you mind your own goddamn business? Those things are more important to us. But seriously, Venus is a sweetheart and loyal to her man. Even if I WASN'T smitten with her curvy figure, I'd still consider her a catch.
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Happy Halloween, guys. Someone asked me if I was gonna have a Halloween-themed update. I decided against this. I'm already sick of girls putting on hookered-up, cheap-ass, synthetic costumes pretending to be a slut for one day of the year. These women are cowards. I'm a fan of those perennial freaks who can do it in jeans and a sweater. If you're like me, Penelope Kay is your gal. She has this wholesome charm on the exterior, but inside is as wild and uninhibited as they come. Stick around and you'll get to see more.
"Don't worry. I already scolded our contributor, Max, for his inclusion of McDonald's in this perfectly delightful smut featuring Lana Lane. I explained that the Zishy demographic is made up of Giga Chads who don't consume junk food and care deeply for their well-beings. Sure, we all might grab some fries in a moment of weakness, like if we are on a layover at the Denver airport and the edible is kicking in hard. But that is really rare. Our body is a temple, for the most part."
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This is Julie Bernal from closer to the equator. Her boyfriend hit me up and said that she was a natural eyecatcher and was ready to be admired on Zishy. After seeing some test shots, I said I had the Bitcoin ready to make that happen. So if you have a girlfriend, friend, wife, cousin, sister, or mother like Julie, and you are not hitting me up, that is just outright cruel. Spread the happy. It's only pictures. You still get to enjoy the real thing.
"I know what you are thinking. ""OMG, she's adorable!"" See, I told ya. That was my exact reaction, too. Gabriella Noren's thick curls and speck-tacular freckles send me to the moon. We encountered dark skies, rain, and pre-flight anxiety during these photos, but we were tenacious and managed to hodge-podge an exciting update. Expect more of this unique beauty."
Texas likes to do everything in a big way, including its gas stations. This is Katie Darling at Buc-ee's. The place perplexes me. I feel impressed, yet utterly disappointed at the same time. Marketing pro-tip, using a beaver as your company mascot is money in the bank. Katie and I got the stink eye from a few God-fearing patrons, but we had fun and that's all that really matters. Enjoy Buc-ee's.
Last year, I found a picture on the web of a marvelous young woman with smooth brown skin, thick dark hair, and a stunning natural figure. I surveyed my Twitter followers asking if they knew who it was, and within a couple of hours, I was connected to someone in Berlin who promised to bring Luna Silver to Zishy. Score! This is proof that social media can serve a purpose beyond spreading hate and sadness throughout the world. Hope you dig Luna as much as I do. Follow realzishy on the bird. Peace out.
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Here is the second part of my idyllic morning with Jezebel. There will be a part three that continues in her bedroom, but that will drop much later. Don't worry. It will be worth the wait. And remember, I am always available to photograph your beautiful wild friendloversistercousinmother whenever she is ready to be admired by thousands. Have a great weekend.
Miki Pedangen might never pose nude for me or for any other photographer, but I am still going to keep shooting her. Her beauty is exceptional and undeniable. Bonus video shows her lively character. Also, I have finally made it home from my summer travels. Now just getting back into the swing of things. Thanks for your patience. Happy Friday.
I really enjoyed Middlesex. The novel follows one family across different eras and under some of the strangest circumstances. The topics of incest and hermaphroditism could have easily been used to shock the reader. And although their explorations are shocking, I am ultimately drawn in by the human and historical aspects of the narrative. I really hate to agree with Oprah on this one, but it is a great book. Minka Giertz is also pretty great. There will be more of her soon.
The story with Chase Jenaro is that she wanted to make some extra money exploring her kinky side before she left for boot camp. Chase had enlisted in the military a few months prior and had worked hard to get her body into shape. She felt a renewed confidence and wanted to showcase her results. I eagerly accepted the opportunity. There will be more to come of this brave beauty. Go easy on the holiday cookies!
"Part two as promised. Weed has caused me a lot of grief. Like that time I absentmindedly left the door open at my friend's apartment, allowing her dog to run outside into the middle of a busy street at night. She said it wasn't my fault. She said it was bound to happen eventually. But we both knew. I fucked up, bad. Even at such a low point I understood just as I understand now, that if I was gonna continue to do drugs, which I most certainly did, I needed to learn how to keep my shit together. So yeah, the lesson is to keep your shit together. Life has consequences. Happy 4/20. --Buzz Lightyear"
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Ileana Burgos is back and brought to us again by Dan, a contributor from Colombia. I only approve the best of the best models for contributing photographers, because, well, this is my job and my site. I don't see why I would hire someone to do my job unless they have very special talent to work with. Angie definitely qualifies. I will get her back a few times before my Zishy days are done. Happy Monday.
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Let me introduce you to Sunny Radford. She is a college student in Texas who felt like she deserves a few added benefits for paying such high tuition. We decided to utilize her campus as a backdrop and take some cheeky photos. Fortunately, all that money they take in doesn't go towards top-notch security. But I am sure the dean's pockets are staying well-padded. Happy Saturday.
These were taken back at a time when wearing a napkin on your face was thought to protect you from a highly contagious disease, but once you were sitting and eating, you were safe. We really lost our damn minds, didn't we? Anyways, Greta is welcome every holiday season at Zishy HQ. A bonus video should arrive tomorrow.
I have been there before. You think your life is over because she does not return your affection. Trust me, that small detail needs to be a deal-breaker. You will start to feel better once you relent your pursuit. Just because you don't have a good job or good hygiene or good looks doesn't mean you have nothing to offer the opposite sex. You have charisma and that is super important. Remember that time you made your grandmother laugh with those wacky jokes about indigenous peoples. See! There's still hope, my boy.
Autumn weather is nutty in LA. You could have a warm, sunny, buns-out afternoon at the beach turn into a cloudy, nippy evening within minutes. Isabella Herzog is the right type of woman for this occasion. She is all smiles in most conditions. The only time she grew concerned was when I asked if I could pay her with a Degenerate Ape NFT. Some people still want that dirty fiat. Oh wellz. Hodl.
Alevtina is back and smoking as always. This is a continuation from her previous update and includes a 4 minute bonus video. It is rare to encounter such a natural performer like Ms. Batman. Home run is an understatement. She sends it into orbit.
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Sometimes people will ask what I do for a living and sometimes I will tell them that I just have fun. I have a feeling that most don't believe me. In actuality, I save lives. Namely, mine. If I didn't have this, I'd be stuck in some dead end job, eating like shit, hating everyone, counting down the days until the Big Sleep. Possibly, even thinking of potential 'shortcuts'. For this reason, I remain grateful to you, to the models, and to life in general. Moon and Suzie are of a rare breed.
Erna is another true specimen of female beauty. She has great hips and seems quite hip. I doubt I would have been able to sit with her or her crowd at the high school lunchroom. That's okay. I now have all that I need.
I am a lucky bastard. Not only do I get to travel to Italy and photograph stunning women like Claudia Veneza. Not only do I get to eat squid ink pasta, sip a glass of fine wine, and jerk off after to women's indoor volleyball highlights. I get to do something even more satisfying. I get to bring you muffins along for the ride. I hope you enjoy this shyte and I'll keep trying hard to make it better in order to express my gratitude. Turn off your phone and sweep well tonight. More Claudia to come.
"Introducing Jacie Verbena. I like her. She seems like she has a good time being photographed. Kudos to our contributor in Ukraine. Does your government ask your permission before sending its citizens to kill or die? Doubt it. War is dumb. Part 2 tomorrow."
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The city can be a lonely place. You barely even say hi to anyone who lives at the same street address. You race past thousands of faceless strangers on a daily basis. You want meaningful relationships, but you also don't want to be annoyed any further by the existence of another human being. So when you finally find a kindred spirit that you want to spend time with, they are worth their weight in gold. Nina Presley and Skye Blue seem to have found something special. Each other.
Here we go. My first time shooting for Zishy in The City. Start spreading the news. New York City has a lot to live up to now in my eyes. I was able to bring together 3 amazing women on short notice. Skye Blue (the girl with the blue eyes), Nina Presley (the girl with the blue hair that resembles ScarJo), and Barbie Qu (the girl in the black dress). We had a perfect afternoon teasing all over Manhattan. You will see more from this Big Apple adventure soon. Evevntually, we made in to Central Park. Then, there were some taken in a friend's apartment. Peace and love.
Carmen Rae might look frail but she is no snowflake. It is too hot in Florida for snowflakes. This state requires courage and a relaxed attitude. You are forced to live amongst people with diverse backgrounds. You must survive in a trashy, drug-addled society, which is run by an utterly corrupt government. And your entire way of life will soon be wiped out by the devastating effects of climate change. Actually, now that I think about it, other than the pythons, gators, and hurricanes, Florida is very similar to the rest of this country. Kisses from the Sunshine State!
Here are two fabulous women that I went above and beyond to bring to Zishy. Shyla Volbeck, the brunette, is very kind and approachable despite her intimidating beauty. Moon Torrance is ultra-confident in herself and outspoken with her views. Both could work in the seedy underworld of the fashion industry if they were so inclined. Luckily, we can see them be more than mannequins pushing absurdly priced products here at Zishy.
Olivia Yukon is back. She participated in the quarantine contest earlier this year and also submitted a ZishTok dance video. This time I experienced Olivia teasing the socks off of me in person. I love when it is sweater dress weather in LA. More to come.
"This was a quick set of photos that I took of Melba Chastain in Texas. Turns out that we live in the same area. This time, she was sporting more of a tan than the last time I saw her. Melba seems so refined and female. Her smooth bronzed skin, paired with long lustrous hair--she probably puts a lot of effort into her appearance. I will have to try that for myself one day. Part 2 soon is what I'm thinking."
"Of course there was more of Miquela's visit to nature, which was featured late last year. It is time to get back outdoors and give the mosquitoes their due. I will bring you a video of this adventure tomorrow. Maybe an xtra. You guys have a good one."
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Among other sports, Moon Torrance played tennis at a high level when she was in high school. She may have outgrown her old outfit, but she can still serve a mean soggy ball when it's rainy out and a camera is pointed in her direction. Stay tuned for more of this lively performer. Moon loves the spotlight.
I met you at JC Penney. I think your name tag said Meadow. I cold step to you with a fresh pack of gum. Somehow I knew you were lookin' for some. Like a fruit that's ripe for a pickin'. I wouldn't do you like that Zankou Chicken. Cause only you've got a thing that I just got to get with. I just got to get with you. And you know what we're gonna do Zishy! Thanks for the lyrical help, Beck. And especially thanks to Meadow Brink for searing some fantastic memories into my mind.
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